I’ve seen it happen. Your friends start to get married, have babies, buy houses, get bank loans, start saving for retirement. In the meanwhile, your trying to figure out which Netflix show to watch next. Or so you’re making yourself appear.
Yes, your friends have outgrown you. No more late night binge drinking (you can’t do that anyway, because you can’t stay up past 11 pm), no more middle of the day improv coffees and gossip, no more spending hours doing nothing. That’s what your 20s were about. That and figuring out what to do with your life. Well, some of them have done that.
The concept of bffs has really been romanticized. Sure, in a world where your biggest worry is the next exam or the next date, it’s easy to see how a friendship can stand the test of anything. But, that world only lasts for a maximum of 10 years. After that, there’s working overtime, building a family and getting credit to buy a new car.
Room mates move out and your significant others moves in.The choice for a place to live is based on the proximity to a job or a good school. And interests start to get divided.
Some are better at adulting than others, and the latter is left behind. You might make efforts in keeping up, like attending grown-up wine tastings or kids birthday parties, acting like you are so happy to become and adoptive aunt or uncle, but you know you don’t belong there.
There’s nothing for you to talk about, as the conversation blends between first words and mortgage claims. You’re only present for the ‘remember that time when…’ stories, which are all you’ve got left.
Just so you know, that’s ok! It’s ok, as long as you feel happy with your life. You don’t need to speed up getting married or making babied, just because in college you promised you will raise your babies together.
It’s ok that people outgrow you and it’s ok that you don’t want to grow up. There’s no rule that says, you have to check items certain items off a list when you reach a certain age and you shouldn’t. You may lose some friends along the way, but that’s just natural selection.
Live your life, follow your dreams, travel, watch good movies and make memories!
And if you want to meet new people, check out these 10 ways to make new friends!